Reel Review Mom

Mean Girls, but with catchy Church moments… Oh, yeah. . .

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So, today I wanted to share with you one of my favorite movies… Most people don’t know that I actually went to a Christian private school for about 4 years from 7th grade to 11th grade and it was traumatizing. FOR REAL. I still have nightmares about that school, the administrators, and the so-called really super-duper Christian students. Yeah… have you ever heard the saying about the minister’s son is the worst… It’s true…

So yeah, for whatever twisted ass reason, I loved Saved! because, thank you dear Jesus, after revealing the hypocrisy that is Christian education, I came out remotely unscathed. Well, that’s all you’re going to hear for now from me….. There’s more to that story but, best for my autobiography……

ANYWAY, let’s rewind to the early 2000s, when Mandy Moore was the reigning queen of wholesome pop anthems, Jena Malone was the indie darling of every misunderstood teen, and Macaulay Culkin (yep, that Culkin—of “AHHH!” face fame from Home Alone) was resurfacing in roles that were edgier, weirder, and absolutely delightful. Out of this unlikely combo came Saved!—a teen comedy so drenched in ironic piety that it feels like Tina Fey secretly wrote it after binge-reading the Left Behind series.

Here’s the elevator pitch: Saved! is basically Mean Girls, but instead of the Plastics terrorizing high school hallways with designer pink cardigans, you’ve got Christian mean girls armed with purity rings, devotional planners, and the occasional exorcism attempt. The setting is American Eagle Christian High School (yes, it’s exactly as over-the-top as it sounds), where teenagers juggle faith, hormones, and peer pressure while also trying not to flunk gym class.

Jena Malone plays Mary, the good Christian girl who’s as devout as she is earnest. Her world is flipped when her boyfriend comes out as gay. After a dramatic vision (involving Jesus, a pool, and more awkwardness than a youth group icebreaker), Mary does what any confused teen with a WWJD bracelet might do: she sleeps with him, believing it’s her God-given mission to “cure” him. Spoiler alert: it doesn’t work. What it does do is leave her pregnant, scared, and slowly ostracized by the holier-than-thou clique led by Hilary Faye, played with maniacal, scripture-wielding energy by Mandy Moore.

Hilary Faye is Regina George in a cross necklace—ruthless, manipulative, and ready to turn prayer circles into power plays. Moore is hysterical in this role, turning every line into a sanctimonious dagger. She flings Bible verses like ninja stars, and her favorite pastime seems to be public shaming disguised as divine intervention. If Regina George handed out burn books, Hilary Faye hands out judgment in the name of Jesus. Both are terrifying. Both are iconic.

And then there’s Roland (Macaulay Culkin), Hilary Faye’s wheelchair-using brother, who teams up with Cassandra (Eva Amurri), the school’s lone Jewish rebel, to form the unlikely, irreverent duo of the film. Roland and Cassandra basically serve as the Statler and Waldorf of this Christian circus—mocking, scheming, and reminding us that satire doesn’t always need a pulpit, just a well-timed smirk.

The genius of Saved! is that it walks this razor-thin line between parody and genuine heart. It’s hilarious watching Hilary Faye stage an intervention by pelting Mary with a Bible, yelling, “I am filled with Christ’s love!” But in the middle of the absurdity, the movie actually pokes at big, important questions: What does it mean to believe? Where’s the line between faith and fanaticism? And how do you fit into a community that preaches acceptance but practices exclusion?

Like Mean Girls, the comedy is sharp because it’s rooted in truth. Instead of cafeteria tables divided by cliques, we get Christian rock bands, virginity pledges, and pastor pep rallies. Instead of “on Wednesdays we wear pink,” it’s “on Sundays we shame sinners.” But the social dynamics are identical: the desire to belong, the fear of rejection, the cruelty masked as concern.

And yet, unlike a lot of teen comedies of that era, Saved! isn’t just snark. Jena Malone gives Mary real depth, showing us the pain and confusion of someone trying to reconcile her personal choices with the rules she’s been taught her whole life. Mandy Moore’s Hilary Faye is a villain, sure, but she’s also the product of a system that teaches young people to wield religion like a weapon. Even Macaulay Culkin, mostly quipping from his wheelchair, slips in moments of tenderness that remind you there’s a real person under the sarcasm.

By the time the film builds to its climax—Mary going into labor at prom, Hilary Faye’s hypocrisy exposed, and everyone crammed into the back of an ambulance—you realize the movie has done something sneaky. It’s made you laugh at the absurdities of Christian high school politics, but it’s also made you care about these characters. And that’s why it holds up nearly two decades later: it’s not just parody, it’s empathy in disguise.

If Mean Girls gave us “you can’t sit with us,” Saved! gave us “you can’t pray with us.” And honestly, both belong in the teen comedy hall of fame. The movie may be campy, it may be irreverent, but it never punches down. Instead, it lovingly skewers the world it’s set in while still letting its characters grow beyond stereotypes.

So if you’ve ever wondered what would happen if Regina George got baptized, armed herself with a Bible, and declared spiritual war on anyone who dared oppose her—Saved! is your answer. It’s hilarious, it’s biting, and beneath the satire, it’s surprisingly sweet.

Final verdict: Saved! is a heavenly comedy with a devilish sense of humor. Think Mean Girls, but with altar calls, cross jewelry, and a lot more Bible-throwing, which is detrimental to your health in more ways than one.